Every call has a beginning

A quiet moment when God

whispers a promise to a mother’s heart.

A holy place where a father bows

and faithfully accepts the journey set before him.

A miraculous morning that unexpectedly dawns…

Casting its first light on a chosen threshold.

A gentle knock..a closed door opens.

A sacred invitation sent by the Father

Leads to the other side of the world.

Where lonely hearts stare out orphanage windows

Praying for someone to care..

And then one morning,

On an ordinary day

An orphan’s life changes...

God sends them a second chance...

Through you.

--author unknown

Orphans Deserve Better - A call to action

I've added a new photo link to my sidebar. Orphans Deserve Better is a grassroots effort to counter the Warner Brothers movie, Orphan, set for release soon.

Please take a moment to click on the link and sign the petition. Far-fetched stories can subtly shape views of the world. This movie leaves the impression that orphans are damaged goods, those who know better must react by being the voices for the children around the world who cannot speak for themselves.

Why adopt? Why China?

Orphans of God...

My new love, joy unfolding...

I have a new love in my life, my attention is captivated with it's mysterious, yet fulfilling nature. I've followed my love to new hangouts, leisurely wandering store aisles with thoughts of my love in mind, spending many late nights roaming blogs that share my love.

To the dismay of one,
And the skepticism of another,

I introduce my new love, I think I'll call her Mags...
Just a few of the reasons I fell in love with Mags...

Your built in needle threader, how long has this special feature been around?

Your button to make the needle go up or down, rather than using the wheel on the side like my junior high home ec teacher taught me.

Your speed control, we can fly new alleys together or slow down to enjoy the ride.

Your sharp thread cutter, which I've learned can also slice the seam allowance if I'm not careful.

Oh, the depths I long to explore my new love. Perhaps one day soon, as our relationship solidifies, I will feel comfortable enough to move from the solitary straight stitch and explore your auto button holer and decorative stitches.

Pet Peeves

I’m in a mood today, a dirty no good rotten mood. Isn’t there a children’s book about that? My mood is probably stemming from a lack of reasonable sleep lately due in part to Norman, my 11 year old lab who is acting like a whiney toddler lately, work woes, and because I keep forgetting to get my estrogen prescript refilled. A woman with a lapse of estrogen is not a good thing.

Norman, while the love of my life for his whole hearted dedication to me, is driving me nuts because of that dedication. He has to be by my side at every turn and movement in my home. His latest lovely habit is to bark incessantly at me in a loud, big dog sorta way. He barks, not because he is hurt, more out of boredom, he barks if I’m on the phone, if I’m on the computer, if I’ve just finished petting him, if I’m in the bathroom, well, you get the picture. I spoke with a pet obedience trainer who advised me to treat the behavior like a child’s annoying behavior, ignore it and it will go away. BWAAHAA, Norman upped the anti and barks more and louder! Time out is my new thing. Upon avoiding one warning of “few more minutes, night night good boy” (which has always worked in the past), Norman now gets dragged to the bedroom and I shut the door to give us some space. His timeout lasts less than two minutes as his attention span is less than that and usually works for a little while. (Thank goodness for my sweet girl, Bailey, who is such an easy dog to share my life.)

Work…it is what it is, I do not like being in a position where I’m not happy with my job. I can’t change it and in my heart I’m deeply grateful to have a decent job in this economy. I’m just tired of the “no good deed will go unpunished” operating theory.

So, while I’m on a whiney roll, I thought I’d list a few pet peeves, perhaps some bloggers will relate, and some bloggers may think I need to get a life, (thank you, I have one, it is good, but to each life some rain must fall, and it’s cloudy weather here in my world at the moment)!

My random list of current pet peeves:

• Public forums for single women where married women join a discussion thread to talk about their married lives. Hello, the heading is “single” why are you posting there about how long you’ve been married? This trend seems to happen regularly on the RQ site, which is why I limit my postings about “single life” to closed forums.


• Married women who complain when their husband/S.O. is away that they have had to be a “single mother.” OMG – get real, you have the security of another paycheck and a backup pair of hands; try balancing responsibility of a home, a family, auto repairs, health issues, and finances all on your own. I’m not there yet (ala single mother) but I can tell this will be a hot button for me.


• Politicians that only help constituents when it brings them into the spotlight. This is directed to Kay Bailey Hutchinson, a fellow adoptive parent, who never responded to my previous writing. Umm, Kay, not a good way to recruit voters if you’re going to run for governorship. (Shout out to Rep Hensarling and Sen Cornyn for their previous efficient and helpful responses!)


• The local immigration office. Today marks 7 weeks since my fingerprints were taken for the third time in the 171 process. You’ve got my money. Really now, how long does it take to stamp a document with “good for another 18 months.”


• Rude coworkers (please note that drama queens are cute on toddlers, not grown adults), neighbors who don’t mow their lawns, selfish people, hair dressers that do not understand that a ½” trim does not mean chop 2” off of layers, oh, and one more, whiney people! LOL

Ok, vent over. I’m off to climb out of my whiney pit. Please pass the chocolate!

Life. A perspective by Mother Teresa

Life is an opportunity, benefit from it
Life is beauty, admire it.
Life is bliss, taste it.
Life is a dream, realize it.
Life is a challenge, meet it.
Life is a duty, complete it.
Life is a game, play it.
Life is costly, care for it.
Life is wealth, keep it.
Life is love, enjoy it.
Life is mystery, know it.
Life is a promise, fulfill it.
Life is sorrow, overcome it.
Life is a song, sing it.
Life is a struggle, accept it.
Life is tragedy, confront it.
Life is an adventure, dare it.
Life is too precious, do not destroy it.
Life is luck, make it.
Life is life, fight for it.

~ Mother Teresa ~

In memory of my dad, who would have been 72 today. He was my hero, the man who taught me to enjoy life's humorous moments, that sarcasm can be funny, that a hug really can heal life's disappointments, and a man that loved my mother with true, lifetime devotion. For that last one, he is also the man I will forever judge all my relationships by. Miss ya, Dad, and when we meet again in heaven, I will ask why you never told Mom "no," thus leaving your kids to deal with that one! LOL (note: inside family joke)

Finding a new church home

It's Sunday. All week I've psyched myself up to visit church again. I have a church home, my family's church. Over the years it wasn't seeming to meet my needs. The pastor, I love, his sermons inspire me; at rough times in my life he has been a confidant and guide. My soul needed more though. As I sat in the congregation, I looked around and saw a lack of diversity. In my heart I knew it was time to start seeking a place where my daughter wouldn't stand out in the crowd, even a congregation as nice as my church home.

This weekend I kept studying the myriad of Sunday School classes at a different church. It was time to move from the sanctuary to the next level. Sunday morning arrived, I reviewed the spreadsheet online again, knowing full well that the only way to find a place in a mega-church is to connect with the smaller groups. I made deals with myself. First the dogs would get a long walk, if there was time, I'd go to Sunday School, otherwise, just try the Sunday worship as opposed to my occasional visits to the Saturday evening service. Ok, dogs were walked, and I managed to shower, dress and even curl my hair in record time. The Lord was making this too easy. Satan was pulling me the other way. Finally I told myself I could visit the nearby Super Target if I just went. (Nothing like incentive, right, besides God knows my heart.)

I show up at the mega-church and found a quick parking spot. Ok, not funny Lord. If He kept this up, I'd have time to find a Sunday School class rather than ducking into the Sanctuary for the early service. I ran up the steps and entered the door. A woman was getting a cup of coffee and looked over. I smiled and was greeted in return. I saw her enter the first church classroom nearby. The sign on the door said Womens Bible Class - All Ages. Ok, Lord, not funny, obviously I was meant to enter the door. I walked in and took a seat in the front row, kinda close to the door...

It was a small class, only about a dozen women. I noticed many name badges on the wall and wondered if this was the typical size or if a very large number of women were already at Target, instead of in Sunday School. The women were a friendly mix of single and married, most my age or a older. I truly didn't want to judge, but I'll admit to thinking "hmphh, this class is too small." Ok, Goldilocks, what did I want? I'd asked for a smaller group and one had been presented right to me, as soon as I had entered the church.

I looked ahead at the posters on the wall, it was then that my heart skipped a beat, the first poster I read said "CHINA - moving toward opportunity." The next poster spoke to my soul:

GO where you never thought you would.
DO what you never thought you could.
BE who you always knew you should.
Take Jesus to China.

To be honest, I didn't fully get all I could out of the class lesson, I felt unprepared. I was distracted. My eyes continued to be drawn back to the posters. Each line spoke to me. Maybe I've found a church home afterall.

All of this reminds me, God is in control. Everything will be ok. I can step out of the boat and not sink if I keep my faith in Him.

And that trip to Target...well, Chloe now has a nice assortment of sippy cups and BPA-free dishes. Maybe one day in the future, as we sit down to eat, I'll be able to share with her how I found our church home, and that God truly does work in mysterious ways.

The outtakes

While I had the camera at taking pictures of the LID inchworm, I thought I would attempt some photos of the dogs in the newly cleaned-out spare room. With the help of my mom and a large stash of early adoption wait shopping, the room was recently transformed from a storage catch-all to a combo craft room (for now) and future play room.

Yeah, we can cooperate, but our posture won't win us any dog show awards.

Hey, where's the camera, I need to show my best side.
What's up with this? It's so hard to get a good picture of Norman (camera shy) and then Bailey has her eyes closed! (My brother said Bailey was prob complaining about the lighting not being right for her photo shoot and working with amateurs...)Uhm, this is not how self-timer works, my girl loves to be up close on the action...

Camera hog...
Norman has his party face on, meanwhile Bailey's has her sights set on greener pastures...

And that's a wrap, Bailey's definitely over this photo shoot.

Really, how long is a minute?

Oh bother, just lovely. That's what I thought to myself as I felt my footing slip in the mud and my body slowly fall to the concrete. Really, skinned knees at my age? The dogs and I were having a nice brisk walk this morning, and I slipped on the smallest patch of mud from a yard's sprinklers. Perhaps it was payback for my staring too long at a neighbor's garden, or just as likely because my thoughts were distracted and I wasn't truly enjoying the moment, a breezy coolness of the early day in the beginnings of a too hot Texas summer.

It's funny though how falls, like traffic accidents, seem to happen in slow motion. It's in that instant that I wonder if I could just reach out, grab for safety and stop the hurling of the moment. Yet, fun times with family and friends seem to go by so quickly.

How will it be in that moment when my daughter is at last place in my arms? Knowing in advance it will happen quickly, but what will there be a moment of time in slow motion. Will our hearts connect quickly or will it be the slow natural bonding, where one day I look back and barely remember time before her. Possibly it will be both, ok, my heart will prob connect quicker, whereas Chloe may want more time to build the trust. I pray that God grants her love each day until we our brought together into a family at last. It seems like such a cliche now to have heard so many BTDT families say the heartache of the wait fades away in an instant on that blessed gotcha day. For now though, the days pass slowly, while the minutes fly by.


How long is a minute?
(author unknown)

A man was taking it easy, lying on the grass and looking up at the clouds. He was identifying shapes when he decided to talk to God."

God," he said, "how long is a million years?"

God answered, "In my frame of reference, it's about a minute."

The man asked, "God, how much is a million dollars?"

God answered, "To me, it's a penny."

The man then asked, "God, can I have a penny?"

God answered, "In a minute."

Inching closer to Chloe - 37 months

Today is the 37th month anniversary of my LID. Funny how the first year, each month was celebrated. Then in the 2nd year it was just odd, as the third year of anniversaries approached, I went from sad to acceptance (slow learner!).

In honor of yet another anniversary, my mood has changed to more optimism and instead of looking back, I'm ready to look forward and mark off the days referred until my LID. I recently noticed a travel mate had made a paper link chain to represent the rest of the LIDs until our LID. Since it finally feels like its going to happen in less than a year, I followed their idea with a twist. When my nieces were learning to read in 1st grade, the teacher encouraged them to make a wall caterpillar with an oval for each book they read. Needless to say, their caterpillars wrapped the walls of their rooms and went down the hallway. The ladybug represents my log-in, May 18, 2006.
The body of the caterpillar is made up of ovals with one LID on each oval.
In anticipation of the next referrals going through March 20th, I'm looking forward to shortening the inch worm by removing 6 days off his body!

A Month of Celebrations

This past May was such a special month of celebrations in my family. One niece graduated college summa cum laude and my other niece graduated high school 4th in her class of over 400. They are not just great students, but also great friends. Sometimes I feel sad that Chloe won't have a sister so close, my heart is comforted though by knowing that these girls will be awesome cousins and role models.

Sweet sisters, dearest friends

May 2009 also brought the 36 month anniversary of my paperwork being logged in China. Being busy with the graduation preps and celebration parties made the anniversary so much more bearable as it was easy to feel the love and support of family and friends. Plus, now that 3 years have gone by, I truly feel that much closer to my daughter, and Lord willing, I believe I will see her face in the next six to nine months. Along the way, rumor queen posted some revised projections and I can't even express how stoked I was to see my LID on the chart at last. Even with the worst case projections, my heart has been lifted. What a difference this feels since I've been saying "another year" for so long!